This week we are going to take a dive into the beautiful world of love, and more specifically, how we each receive love differently. Each of us receives love in our own unique way. Some people feel very loved when they are given gifts, others feel more loved when they get to spend good, quality time with their partner. Maybe you feel the most loved, not when getting a gift, but instead when someone tells you how great and amazing you are. There are many ways we are able to express and receive love and it is really useful for us to try learn the language of love that each of our loved ones “speak”. In his book “The 5 Love Languages” Gary Chapman outlines 5 different ways in which he has identified people being able to feel loved. They are Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. While these may not be the only ways we can communicate love to each other they are certainly a good guideline.
A lot of misunderstanding can come in when we express our love to others in the way in which we ourselves receive love. This can sometimes be problematic and can cause frustrations between people. Just because you enjoy receiving gifts it does not automatically mean that your loved one feels the same. They may prefer getting to relax and watch a movie with you, or they may need to be told how much they mean to you. Spending time observing and learning what language your friend or partner speaks is a big part of the adventure and fun of friendships and relationships. The results of knowing how to communicate love to someone special are extremely rewarding and bring a deep strength into those friendships and relationships. Naturally as we learn more about those close to us and draw closer to people we will start to figure these things out. It is a good thing to know and practice. If your spouse really enjoys acts of service and you constantly try express your love through giving them a gift you are going to find yourselves both being frustrated. It can be really helpful to talk about this with your partner or friends. Let them know what it is that makes you tick, what ways you feel the most loved, and even how you express love naturally. Sometimes it is important for us to be able to speak the correct language of love for our partner but it can be equally important at times for our partner to understand how we show love. Gaining an understanding of this in a relationship or even friendship can go a long way to helping empower you to be a better friend while also making you a more easily understood partner to your loved ones.
It is so easy for things to get lost in translation, even something as beautiful as loving someone is open to being misunderstood. That’s why we encourage you to try take some time and learn what it is that fills up the love tank of the people close to you. It will go a long way to helping you all feel happy and fulfilled.
